Comfort Zone
Fourth in the Vincent Calvino P.I. Series
Chapter 1
With the overhead sun beating
down, Calvino headed in the direction of hundreds of people who
huddled around a long row of concession stands with volunteers hawking
everything from lotto tickets, hot dogs, hamburgers, to Budweiser
beer. Kids rode on the Ferris wheel and the merry-go-round. An image
of his own daughter, Melody, flashed through his mind, leaving some
guilt, some pain as it screamed on through his consciousness. A
few feet away, an American Chamber of Commerce guy in baggy shorts
and Washington University T-shirt pressed a bullhorn to his mouth
and announced that substituting boiled eggs was, once again this
year, against the rules. And no rolling of eggs. You had to toss
them in the air. This guy was obviously a veteran of a number of
Bangkok Fourth of July celebrations. The crowd of Thais and farang
dressed in shorts and T-shirts looked relaxed even though they were
sweaty, hot and hungry. Behind this superficial informality were
the serious players on the local scene, the lawyers, bankers, doctors,
embassy types, merchants, journalists, NGOs, preachers, and Peace
Corp workers. This was the crew of America's Starship Enterprise
lost in the vastness of Asian space and time.
Then he saw Harry Markle waving
at him to come over to his table.
Harry Markle, his Thai wife,
nicknamed Noi, and their two kids occupied a table. Occupied was
the right word. There were few tables with umbrellas and if you
left one for a moment some Hell's Angel, Mormon or preacher would
pounce on it and you would need a loaded assault rifle to get it
back. Noi was a registered pharmacist and had her own shop which
stocked New Age herbal remedies. The shop, the only one like it
in Bangkok, was listed in a couple of the travel guides to Thailand
and she was thinking of opening a second branch at Seacon Shopping
Mall. Harry Markle was a telecommunications expert, linking companies
and people to the Internet, setting up nodes in places like Hong
Kong and Finland. He laid down software so complex and sophisticated
that, once it was hooked into various networks of computers, the
effect was to grant Harry lifetime job security; he could never
be fired from his job because no one could replace him, and all
that transmitted data would go over the side of a cliff like a spooked
herd of buffaloes in a thunderstorm.
Calvino sat down in a plastic
chair as Markle pulled the tab on a can of Bud, beer foaming through
the hole and down the side of the can.
"Great weather today, 99
said Harry.
One of his daughters, the fourteen-year-old,
came to the table with one of her friends, eating a hot dog, the
mustard squirting onto her hand.
Dr. Penguin, dressed in a dinner
jacket with a toy penguin head shaped as a hat which he wore pulled
down over his ears, removed an egg from Harry's two-year-old daughter's
ear. Her eyes got real big.
"You like that, Honey?"
asked Harry, picking her up.
She looked at Dr. Penguin with
the kind of face that looked like it could go either way: cry or
laugh. She started to laugh as Dr. Penguin pulled an egg from Calvino's
ear.
"A private eye shouldn't
go around with eggs in his head, said Dr. Penguin.
"And a penguin should keep
out of the sun," said Noi.
Harry looked at the egg. "At
least it's not scrambled, " said Harry.
"Just hard-boiled,"
said Calvino.
Over the loudspeaker system a
midwestern accent read off a list of lottery announcements, mispronouncing
most of the Thai names. At the next table, several Soi Cowboy bargirls
in shorts and tank-tops were decked out in gold chains and bracelets.
They were trying to keep out of the sun. Bar girls hated getting
a tan. Most of them were village girls from Isan and were sensitive
about the darkness of their skin. Dark skinned wasn't cool. White,
white skin was the meaning of beauty, along with lots of gold to
set it off, according to the Comfort Zone standard of desirable.
"The bar girls never miss
a Fourth of July," said Harry Markle, as Dr. Penguin wandered
off.
"They like fireworks,"
said Noi, who was university educated, and was doing her best to
deflect the conversation about the girls at the next table.
"Yeah," said Harry.
"They are like Willie Sutton. Why do you rob banks, Willie?
That's where the money is. Ladies, why do you come to the Fourth
of July picnic every year?
Because that is where the money
is. Inside every bar girl is a little Willie Sutton voice screaming
out."
Over at the stands people stood
three or four deep gorging on the free popcorn, ice cream, and soda.
Eating ears of corn, leaning over with the butter running over their
hands, giving them a shiny lacquer, and running off-into the grass.
"You have any trouble getting
through the airport security at the gate?" Harry asked.
"Pratt showed his badge.
No problem," said Calvino.
"It helps to be connected.
Some guy with a bar girl set off the alarm at security. That made
for fun. Some logger chick arrived with a SWAT team to rub him down.
He was clean but his girl had one of those toy gun lighters,"
he said, drinking from his beer. "The logger chick asked her
what it was. But her English wasn't so great. So the guy said, 'Look,
my friend is a vice challenged person. 'And she squinted and asked,
'Vice, what's that mean?' 'Vice as in vice squad, 'he said. 'The
toy gun makes her feel safe.' The logger chick nodded, gave her
back the toy gun and waved them through."
Logger chick was the current
expat-speak for overweight middle-aged white women. Someone in a
Washington Square bar once defined a logger chick as a woman with
the biceps of an axe swinger and the legs of a mature redwood.
"Trust me, it happened.
Ask Noi, " said Harry.
"About my sister..."
Noi said, sounding sheepish.
Harry had phoned two days earlier
and said Calvino just had to meet Meow. She was about eight years
younger than Noi smart, beautiful and available. And Meow would
be at the Fourth of July picnic.
"She couldn't make it,"
said Harry, finishing his wife's sentence. "One of those Thai
things."
That always covered a lot of
ground. As it turned out, Noi's sister, Meow, had cancelled the
picnic because she had a call from her astrologer saying under no
circumstances was she to leave the house. The alignment of the stars
had forbidden her from going.
"I didn't say she wasn't
superstitious," said Harry.
"No, you are right. "
"I hope you aren't too disappointed,"
said Noi.
Calvino drank his beer. "Maybe
we can get together on the next full moon."
"Not to let you completely
down, I have some work for you. A personal case."
Calvino came each year with the
expectation of getting an assignment. What he hadn't expected was
that, instead of getting fixed up with Noi's sister, Harry Markle
was going to hire him for a job at the Fourth of July picnic. He
wished he could wash off the cologne. Pratt was right, it was not
such a good idea. Everyone was keeping their distance. The astrologer
had guessed that smell from the movement of the stars and moon and
had warned Meow away, he thought. In the heat he could not help
feel a sadness as the expectation of meeting Meow fell away, drawing
him over the edge into doom and disappointment. Shifting his expectation
from the personal into a work mode was hard at first. The idea of
possible romance was like a loose piece of string; it could be shaped
in any way to fit the imagination until the spell was broken and
the realization set in that he had deceived himself, strung himself
along. He pulled himself together, smiled, and opened another beer.
"A personal case," he heard Harry say again. Case assignments
at the Fourth of July picnic had a habit of always being an omen
of bad karma. Lt. Col. Pratt was right. It had been his primary
reason forgoing year after year. One year he was going to break
that string of bad Fourth of July cases. He knew that Harry Markle
wouldn't let him down.
The year before last, he had
gone after a missing son who had run off with a local girl to Koh
Chang. He brought the kid back by the eighth of July and left the
girl on the island; she had already found a replacement farang with
more money... The kid fell on the ferry deck and broke his arm.
The parents blamed Calvino for not properly looking after their
son. It was a good reason to stiff him for the bill.
Calvino had clients and friends
who expected him to be at the picnic. It was bad for business to
miss the Fourth of July in Bangkok and it was bad to take an assignment
at the Fourth of July picnic. No one ever said it outright, but
it was a loyalty thing. In the middle of Bangkok, forgetting the
Fourth of July picnic was an act of expat treason. The American
Chamber of Commerce, he thought, kept some kind of unofficial blacklist
of those who didn't show up. This year an old friend had phoned
him. Harry Markle, said he had a beautiful present for him.
Now at the picnic he was singing
a different tune.
"I've got a problem, Vinee,"
said Harry.
"Who doesn't?" asked
Calvino.
He had known Harry Markle for
a half dozen years. In other words enough time to learn the basic
catastrophes which had blown through his life, the trail of ghosts
left behind.
"It's my little brother
in Saigon," said Harry.
"He was there for the twentieth
anniversary?" asked Calvino.
"Yeah, he was."
I didn't know you had a younger
brother."
"I left home before he was
born. So let's say we aren't all that close. Now he's working as
a lawyer in Vietnam," said Harry.
So far it didn't sound like much
of a problem. But cases which started soft lipped like this often
had steel jaws and sharp teeth.
"What's his problem? Other
than he's trying to follow in his big brother's footsteps,"
said Calvino.
"Drew has the usual paranoid
feelings of any American thirty-year-old who has never been out
of the States and is trying to make a go of it in Saigon."
"Like what?"
"Someone in the office is
up to the usual monkey shines. Drew says there's something unethical
going on. He kept using the words professional ethics."
Calvino smiled at the word.
"I know, I know, "
said Harry. "The American delusion. It's what got us into Vietnam
in the first place. Drew hasn't found out yet that American ethics
aren't as popular as American junk food and movies. But give him
time. He will learn."
Markle was ex-special forces
and had done two tours in Vietnam. In Asia, every other guy over
forty-five claimed to have served in the special forces, or was
a Green Beret, a Navy Seal; someone who was a mean motherfucker
in the past and who had lived in the jungles on slugs and slit the
throats of Viet Cong until dawn. Harry Markle was the only guy Calvino
had ever met that actually had done it and survived, with a sense
of humor, his life intact. He had a family and had settled in Thailand.
Noi nudged Harry's arm. His eyes
followed her to a dozen Marines dressed in T-shirts and shorts picking
up one end of a thick, long rope. Next came a dozen Mormons, looking
like they had just flunked the physical for army boot camp. They
picked up the other end of the rope. For a moment, Markle's brother
in Saigon was just a slice of conversation left hanging in the air.
"Who you betting on?"
asked Harry, grinning from ear to ear. "God or the Marines?"
"If there were a God you
wouldn't need the Marines," said Calvino.
There was nothing scientific
about this. But American Marines from the US Embassy in Bangkok
had standard issue bull-like necks. The average Mormon looked as
small as a fridge magnet next to the Marine guard. Belief in God
had caused men to believe that miracles could overcome neck size
differences. So in most years the Mormons entered the tug-of-war
contest in Bangkok, meaning they would have to face the Marines
and hope God was listening. And each Fourth of July picnic in Bangkok
it rained like hell just after the US Marines wiped the playground
with a dozen skinny Mormons holding on for dear life as the Marines
dragged them through the mud in a tug-of-war that was never a contest.
Was it the rain which followed God's wrath? Or was it just the rainy
season weather with all those black clouds and claps of thunder
in Bangkok that time of year?
Harry Markle said, "The
Mormons did it once. It was like carrying an elephant up the side
of a hill. It can be done. But it's always difficult and messy."
"Those aren't Mormons,"
said Noi. "That's AT&T."
She was right. She was Thai but
she could still tell the difference between the Mormons and the
telephone company. One paid dividends in this life, one promised
dividends in the next. Thais were forever crossing the boundary
between last, present and next life. It made perfect sense in terms
of continuity and prevented the uneasy sense in the Christian West
that you only got your ticket punched once; it was either up or
down, and never back. for a repeat of another tug-of-war.
A crowd gathered and they could
hear the side bets being made. A small group of old Asian hands
of all nationalities were drinking beer and watching the Marines,
all that muscle and short haircuts looking down the rope like it
was the barrel of a gun. All those black clouds which had accumulated
over the playing field opened up and it started to rain. The Marines
didn't blink an eye. The AT&T team was one man short, and no
one was volunteering to take on the Marines. A vice president found
a consultant hiding behind a table of bar girls and ordered him
onto the field. Then the contest began. Everyone at the table was
on their feet. And the rain came harder. Harry was right; one year
the Mormons actually won the tug-of-war. And it still rained. This
year it rained before the contest was decided.
About eight in the evening the
fireworks display started with the whistle of a rocket shooting
high overhead, which was followed by a blinding flash and a shower
storm of white feathery bursts of white light lit up the black sky.
Calvino glanced to his right and saw how the light from the fireworks
illuminated Markle. His face looked different, rigid, immobile but
alert. He looked like someone caught in the open as a flare floated
down on a tiny parachute and guns opened fire. This was the old
mask that Harry Markle and a lot of other vets wore every year at
the Fourth of July picnic. Vietnam was a one hour and five minute
flight away from Bangkok. For a few minutes they remembered something,
thought Calvino.
"It beats me why my little
brother who was doing perfectly well in New York City would want
to try and play lawyer in a communist regime, " said Markle,
his head turned toward the sky, his mouth slightly ajar.
"Sometimes a younger brother
feels that he has something to live up to. Your two tours in Vietnam
and the drawer full of medals is a whole lot to live up to for anyone."
"But as a lawyer?"
Craning his head around, Harry pushed the black, horn-rimmed glasses
onto the bridge of his nose.
"Maybe it was the only way
he could get himself a way to Vietnam."
Another flash burst lit up the
sky in red, blue and white. The colors of the American flag draining
down the edges of the night sky in Bangkok.
"I want you to go to Saigon
for a few days. Check that he's okay, you know. Give him a talk
about ethics and business in this part of the world. Three hundred
a day plus expenses, right?"
Calvino thought about karma as
he watched another star burst of rockets overhead. "Do I go
or stay?" he asked himself.
"I'd go myself, but I have
this assignment..." said Harry Markle, breaking off as Noi
handed him another beer.
"Okay, three days should
be enough time," said Calvino.
"More than ample,"
said Harry Markle, "Take an extra day and get out in the countryside.
Let's call that a bonus."
First edition
(1995) / 2nd edition (1997) / Current edition (2001) Heaven Lake Press,
267 pp.
 
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